Sis. Maneshkona-Shontae speaks out #2
December 15, 1995
After that, the first real live contact that I received was from the Complex Coordinator, Matthew Phillips. He stopped by my dorm and we talked ten minutes about the hunger strike and 50 minutes about other stuff that is happening. From that conversation, administration (Dean Batt, Jill Carnagi, Director of Residential Life) and Enrique Corredera (Public Relations) -- all of them have pimped that one conversation with Matthew by saying that they have had contact with me. That is not true. That is a lie. Dean Batt said that he had sent Matthew (via Jill Carnagi) to come see me.
Matthew then sent a phone mail to Jill and, however she communicated to her superiors -- whether the phone mail was forwarded or she talked with these people, from that point, for the next four or five days there was no contact from administration because they thought I was okay. Because Matthew had seen me and from their perspective we were the best of friends because we had a good conversation. No one ever contacted me to ask about this conversation. They just took Matthew´s word for it.
Sunday, December 3
Then that Sunday, Day 3, I did get a call from someone in administration ---the mysterious 7:53 AM phone call. Jenni Johnson, previously a counselor at Counseling and Testing, and now Dean Batt´s right hand woman called me letting me know how bad she felt that I named her in my first posting and she told me that I "donÍt know her battles." She has "always been worried about my mental health." So, for someone who is worried about my mental health, I want to question her calling the person´s own home during her third day of a hunger strike at 7:53 am to tell me about how she is hurt because I named her in a posting. I question that she is worried about my mental health and my mental stability. That is a misuse and abuse of power as a counselor. That was my first contact with one of my "people" and that wasn´t too great of a day after she called me.
I contacted Matthew Phillips because I needed to know what he said to these people for them to not contact me and for them to feel fine about not contacting me. He said that he told them that we had a good conversation and that I was looking good (this was my first day of the hunger strike), and that I wanted people to come to the table. No one has ever confirmed with me what was said in any of those conversations.
I needed to tell him that he was not my voice and that I was not the voice for the ALANA community and that he does not need to be speaking for me. If they want to talk with me they will contact me.
President Salmon gave a letter to Tom Gustafson (special assistant to the President). Tom called Matthew to deliver the letter. Matthew came my door, I said I did not want the letter because if they felt the need to give me a letter because they are concerned about me the least they can do is drive by my dorm and drop it off. Obviously, they did not care about me that much, they are just worried about me suing and about what is going to happen to me if I get sick because they will be held liable. Their great concern doesnÍt come from compassion in the heart even though I can"t prove those allegations.
I told Matthew I did not want the letter and to take it back and tell him why he didn´t give it to me. It is wrong. He called Tom Gustafsom and Tom "ordered" him to deliver the letter to me. At that point, I realized that these people are playing hard ball. They are not joking.
Thursday, December 7
At 7:30 am, a housekeeper in Wilks Hall found a note taped to a poster about my hunger strike. The note said: "I´m going to kill her." Jill Carnagi was informed along with other Residential Life staff at 10:30 am. At 9:00 pm, Allison Heard, Graduate Student Assistant at OMA, called Douglas Samuels to tell him what to do about it because Jill Carnagi had not informed him about it. Doug Samuels left me a phone mail to tell me someone was coming to talk with me but did not say what it was about and he said to call him at home if I had any questions. At 11:15 pm, Kristi (residential life) stopped by my room to tell me about the threat -- 15 hours after it was found. Doug Samuels met with me Friday at 9:00 am and told me that the death threat was not intended for me. The note was found at 1:00 am by an RA and tossed away. At 2:00 am, white allies went through the halls putting up posters about the solidarity fast and my hunger strike. Then someone picked up the note (&$34;I´m going to kill her.") and put it up next to the poster about my hunger strike. Police services was not contacted.
Friday, December 8
A newspaper article is written about my hunger strike because 50 white students go on a hunger strike for one day and there is finally publicity. Enrique Corredera was quoted saying that Dean Batt has had written contact with me and President Salmon has also had written contact with me. Dean Batt had not written me at this point. Dean Batt had sent me four phone mails but had not written me at all. Not at all. Furthermore, I found out that he cannot be trusted.
Every place I go, whether it´s my Dean´s office, the Student Health Center, Counseling and Testing -- everywhere I go, somehow Dean Batt finds out that I have been there and, not just that I have been there, but what has been said in supposedly confidential situations.
The first question I ask anyone I have met with is "how far is this conversation going to go?" They all said this conversation is not going to go past this room. Next thing I know, Dean Batt knows. So, I figured, that is why no one has contacted me. That is why he hasn´t said anything to me.
Doug Samuels, the black man with his sexist behavior, called me and wanted to speak with me. I gave the brother a chance. I spoke with him with a witness. That conversation went from me talking about the harassing phone call I got from Jenni Johnson to him acting out the next day in front of a crisis group talking about my situation. At that point, he didn´t know the name of the person who had called me on Sunday morning but he felt the need to act on it to prove something to the administrators that the ALANA community approves of him. I don´t approve of him. I am not going to make any personal attacks. All I have to say that he is not the leader for our community. He was not chosen by us. He was chosen by Dean Batt and Leon Lawrence and all the rest of them. He was personally interviewed by Leon Lawrence and chosen by Dean Batt. So you figure out where his loyalty and accountability lies.
From that conversation, Doug Samuels acted without my permission or knowledge in doing all these things which had ramifications for me because I didnÍt know what was going on.
Past words and action
They really don´t want to hear what the ALANA community wants. Earlier this summer, we had a meeting with President Salmon, Joan Smith, Interim Dean College of Arts and Sciences and Provost Bob Low. We gave them the ALANA Student Bill of Rights that we needed at this university in order to feel safe. We got stonewalled. We got the process of paperwork, paperwork, paperwork and it takes time, it takes time -- and nothing has been done and we are almost at the end of 1995.
In October, we also met with Dean Batt and we said we wanted Lufuno Tshikororo to be our Interim Director of the Office of Multicultural Affairs (OMA). We made an outline of how we wanted OMA to be, how it was going to act and the manner in which the students and staff were going to play a role when the Interim Director Angela Cooke left.
That wasn´t done. When Dean Batt met with the students he told us we had input in the process. Input means no power -- input means we talk for two hours but he had already made his decision about who was going to be there and it was Douglas Samuels. Basically, he wasted our time and left many to believe that we had a voice in the process of who was going to be our leader. Douglas Samuels came to "clean OMA up " and to make it more professional. Translation = make it more white. To neutralize and minimize student activism and the student voices in the community.
You don´t have to take my word for any of this...I am just one person. I am a senior so that means I have been here for four years But, I will tell you one thing -- if you cannot believe what I am saying, you can come to OMA and see what is going on and ask people how they feel about the new director and how do they feel about the process in which he was chosen to confirm or disprove my statements, that is fine. I want people to ask questions.
Wednesday, December 13
I have a scheduled twelve o´clock meeting today with President Salmon that I did not set up but the Campus Minister set up for me. I am not going to be there for many reasons. First, I won´t be here and, second, I would not go even if I was here because it is not about me. If you take me down there are other people who will come after me, who will continue to fight. So, he has to address the people. President Salmon does not want to address the people. He wants to send Dean Batt as his representative to talk with the ALANA students but he wants to meet with me at twelve o´clock today. I have a problem with that, a big problem with that.
I´ve really gotten beaten from many, many people. The last beating I got was from the Campus Minister with whom I met with for three hours discussing why I am doing this. Her as a white woman, first not acknowledging that she is a white woman, but I am sure the white allies will talk with her (hopefully) -- but, her not acknowledging herself as white woman and acknowledging that we speak a different language. That I don´t think like her, nor she like me and it was very difficult communicating with her because everything I said was re-interpreted to mean something else. My frustration level rose and skyrocketed. In the end, she said that I made her feel really shitty. And I told her, I apologize for the way you feel but I don´t apologize for what I said and you need to understand, as well as other white people, that I am not doing this for white people. I am not doing this to educate the white community.
If I spent all my time and energy in educating the white people about what they have done or continue to do in my community, I would not be able to educate my community or show my community an analysis of what happens to us. Just because you are a person of color does not mean that you were born with an analysis of racism. They don´t give you that when you get your birth certificate or your social security number. Oh, by the way, here is an analysis of what racism is and how it plays out in your community. That doesn´t happen.
Jill Carnagi told one of her satff members, "she is not going to die for this." So, they are holding out -- they wonder how long can I go without food -- so they are holding out until then -- until they don´t have to address it.
As far as other white people named on that list --- you need to understand in 1988 there was a takeover and in 1991 there was a takeover. In 1995 and 1996 there is going to be something you have never seen before. Something so big you won´t be able to touch it. So, you can´t push us down. And regardless of whether it is:
threatening us with the judical process, Dean Batt;
or firing us from the Commission, Bob Low;
or questionning our mental stability, Jenni Johnson;
or not coming to the table with the ALANA community, President Salmon;
or manipulating the ALANA community and trying to divide us, Doug Samuels;
or not even responding to anything the ALANA community has said, Tom Tritton;
or not even showing your face, Mara Saule;
or hiding out in the wing and sending your boy, President Salmon.
the time is coming. Don´t worry. Because every five years there is a cycle at this university of revolution and change. And, conflict is good, because out of conflict we learn something. Stay tuned to what is happening at UVM because there is more to come than you think. There are more people on the outside who know about what is happening now. There are people on the inside, white and ALANA people, who are organizing. Each community is doing their own thing. They are fighting for an anti-racist agenda. So I leave it up to you to figure out how that is going to be manifested.
I am just the catalyst to the beginning of the revolution. Just ask yourself -- if Rosa Parks hadn´t sat down in the front of the bus, would we have known who Martin Luther King was?
That one person made a difference.
[This message was transcribed from an audio tape by Judy A. Ashley, at the request of Maneshkona-Shontae Praileau. There will be more to follow.]
