last time i communicated with the public it was through a friend, judy ashley. i wanted the public to know everything in detail but typing is not my area of expertise so she offered to type it if i recorded what i wanted to say. i asked her to send it out through e-mail after i left the university for the semester (because i knew that i would be receiving phonemail messages from all of the people mentioned in my letter).
on jan.2nd tuesday
jill carnaghi, director of residential life returned my phone call in regards to staying in my room over the semester break and where i can pick up my vacation housing keys once i come back to campus. in the same message she voiced her concern "i don't want to be another intrusive white administrator in your face but as director of rez life i am concerned about you as a rez hall student. i just wanted to put that out there." then she went on to say if i can help or provide any assistance please give me a call.
on jan.3rd wednesday
i returned to uvm to finish up on my academic work for the fall ´94 semester. despite being on a hunger strike, i still have to sucessfully complete my 19 credits. please keep in my that my reason being at uvm is a STUDENT first and foremost (or at least that's what i thought).i will NOT use racism or oppression as an excuse for failure at this university or in my life. i do know that it is a factor that i think about everyday of my life because i am not allowed to forget it. classes at uvm begins jan.17th and i returned early to FINISH MY STUDIES NOT NOT NOT MEET WITH DEAN BATT OR ANY OTHER ADMINISTRATOR WHO WISHES TO DISCUSS "MY SITUATION" BECAUSE THEY ARE CONCERNED ABOUT MY PHYSICAL HEALTH.
Graduate schools do not want to hear that i was on a hunger strike for 30 something days and that´s why i didn´t do well fall ´94. i do want to attend graduate school at some point in my life so the grades that i receive are important to me in that factor alone.
jan.4th thursday
3:10pm i received a phonemail message from dean batt, vp for student affairs. he too voiced his concern "i was hoping to talk with you particularly in person and would like to get together with you. i continue to be concerned about your health and welfare." one thing that jill and dean have in common besides them both being concerned about my health and welfare that is they both had a pretty good break. jill said "i had a great break" while dean said "i had a good break."
jan.5th friday
it was around 2:45pm and i went to the office of multicultural affairs (oma) to study. while there the new(interim) director of oma, douglas samuels approached me. he said that i had to do something for him. knowing that we do not have the best relationship i wondered what he wanted. he wanted me to talk with someone.
I SAID NO.
he asked three times and my answer each time and more firmly each time was "i hope that you respect the fact that when a woman says NO she means NO." obviously he does not because he asked me three times. he wanted me to talk with someone who was in his office at the time and this person had something to give me. i told douglas that my room number was 231 coolidge and if he had something to give me "mail it to me." doug said that they were actually on there way over to my room at the time that i came into oma. mr.samuels insisted and he went to his office to talk with this person. recognizing his voice, i identified the person as dean batt, vp for student affairs. i placed my jacket on and left oma. (PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THAT MY INTENTION FOR GOING TO OMA WAS TO STUDY NOT NOT NOT MEET WITH ANYONE).
now you have an update on the latest at uvm. this is very detailed because i don´t want people saying that i didn´t tell the the whole truth. now, all the people who said if there is something that they can do I NEED YOUR HELP. I NEED YOUR HELP IMMEDIATELY. what i gave you up there is the story of what happened to me, but this is the inside scoop of what has been happening since i have been gone.
SOME OF THIS INFORMATION IS CONFIDENTIAL BUT I HAVE MY SOURCES AND I WILL NOT REVEAL THEM UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
1) on dec.14th (the 14th day of my hunger strike) the day after i left the university a couple of administrators met in regards to my hunger strike. i had heard of previous meetings in regards to my hunger strike, but this one was the most descriptive. some of the administrators present were dean batt, douglas samuels, jill carnaghi, peter nobes (REMINDER peter nobes was the physician´s assistant who i was in contact with in regards to my health until i found out that he was also communicating with dean batt about my visit with him. even though i have not eaten for a couple of weeks What happened to doctor-patient confidentiality privilege? (just a question i thought i would pose to the public.)
at that meeting OPERATION DAMAGE CONTROL (this is the name that i gave these team of administrators) was set. basically, this meeting has set the standard in how "they" will deal with "me." dean batt talked about my hunger strike. then they discussed how "DIFFICULTIES ARISE AS IT APPEARS PUBLICLY THAT ADMINISTRATION HAS DONE NOTHING. IN FACT THERE ARE MOVEMENTS ON MANY FRONTS THAT WERE INITIATED BEFORE THE STRIKE WAS ANNOUNCED. THERE ARE ALSO DEADLINES OF JAN.1 APPROACHING WHEN SEVERAL INITIATIVES WERE SUPPOSED TO HAVE RESOLUTION. SINCE THERE IS SO MUCH SCRUTINY, ADMINISTRATIVE RESPONSE TO THE HUNGER STRIKE IS BEING WATCHED CLOSELY. DISCUSSED WAYS WE COMMUNICATE, AND IMPORTANCE OF FACE-TO-FACE COMMUNICATION."
these are there words and not mine. i typed it word for word. the action that was to be done from this meeting was for dean batt to meet with me, shontae, when i return to campus on january 3rd (i still don't know how at a meeting on dec.14th they knew that i was returning on jan.3rd. i had changed my traveling arrangements at the last minute because my initial date of return was jan.5th.)
WHY DO I NEED A LAWYER?
well, i will not discuss that over the net, but trust my judgement when i say that things are getting worse. many administrators are getting scared (re-read their quote from that meeting) and when uvm administrators get scared they do things without thinking. i need a lawyer who will be willing to take uvm on because they are trying to take me out before the students return on the 17th. and you are damn right i too am scared, but it is a different type then what these adminstrators are experiencing. all i am asking is for outside backup. keep watching them , keep asking questions, but more importantly get this information out there to people who are willing to listen because this story must be told.
FINAL THOUGHT -DAY 36-(smile)
i am doing the best that i can with the situation at hand. if anyone wants to know how i am PLEASE contact because only i know how i am doing. i am still alive. the day that my mother (the woman who gave me life with the help of the Creator, of course) tells me to stop then i will stop, BUT until then do not e-mail me telling me that i am killing myself. i went home to my family for the holidays and i have lost weight (don´t ask how much that´s personal). the only physical signs that i have experienced thus far is 1) weight loss 2) short attention span 3) long-term memory isn't so good BUT getting through this i have developed a warp sense of humor to brighten up my day sometime and i´ll share some with you. for weight loss that problem can be fixed in no time when i begin eating again because i started a food diary of all the things that i want to eat. for #2 and #3 it becomes difficult because i am trying to study so i have to re-re-re-read things before i can recite what it was that i was studying, BUT it has made me stronger spiritually because through meditation and prayer it has made realize what is really important in life. you see many people spend all of there lives searching for it but i beginning to see it at 22 years old so am growing even though i have been without solid food for over a month. for those who disagree with my politics, lifestyle, or the way that i am communicating them...here´s my message to you and the others who support me
REMEMBER THAT I AM A HUMAN BEING. I AM SOMEONE´S (GRAND)DAUGHTER, SISTER, COUSIN, NIECE, AND IN THE FUTURE I WILL BE SOMEONE´S WIFE,LOVER, AND MOTHER BUT MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANY OF THOSE RELATIONSHIPS IS THAT I AM A CREATED FROM THE SAME FORCES AS YOU WHETHER YOU CALL THE FORCES A HE, SHE , GOD, ALLAH,JEHOVAH OR... SO WHEN YOU SEE ME OR MY PEOPLES TREAT ME AND US AS HUMAN BEINGS THAT IS ALL I AM ASKING.
PEACE OUT
clarification
many people after reading my long list of details of what has happened so far in 1996 may be confused as to why i would not meet with the one willing participant, dean batt.
REASONS:
1) when i went to oma, my intention was on studying 2) no one else was in the office at the time dean batt, douglas samuels and myself. because i have been on the hunger strike for a while a few people have implied because i haven´t eaten i may have misunderstood them in meetings so to correct this situation when an administrator wants to meet with me it HAS to be scheduled so i can a witness to verify certain points that have been made. no one was there to be my witness so... 3) i returned early to uvm to finish my academics (which is different from #1) because i have to complete my fall ´94 work before the spring semester begins 4) most important one of all I WILL NOT MEET WITH ANY ADMINISTRATOR UNTIL THE UVM STUDENTS RETURN ESPECIALLY THE ALANA (african latino asian native american)STUDENTS BECAUSE REMEMBER THIS IS ABOUT US AS A PEOPLE and approaching me while they are gone is not appropriate.
thank you and peace out again (smile)