Negotiating 
No-man's land: carpet alive, 
Flea season again 

I need a new toy. 
Tail of black dog keeps good time. 
pounce! good dog! good dog! 

The rule for today 
Touch my tail, I shred your hand 
New rule tomorrow 

In deep sleep hear sound 
cat vomit hairball somewhere 
will find in morning 

Cat, fearless hunter 
leaves 'presents' for me near door 
next time I'll wear shoes 

Grace personified, 
I leap into the window. 
I meant to do that. 

Night. Now come night-mice. 
I chase them 'round on loud feet. 
You can't see them too? 

Blur of motion, then -- 
silence, me, a paper bag. 
What is so funny? 

You never feed me. 
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face. 
That will sure show you. 

The mighty hunter 
Returns with gifts of plump birds -- 
Your foot just squashed one 

You must scratch me there! 
Yes, above my tail! Behold, 
elevator butt. 

You're always typing. 
Well, let's see you ignore my 
sitting on your hands. 

My small cardboard box. 
You cannot see me if I 
can just hide my head. 

Terrible battle. 
I fought for hours. Come and see! 
What's a 'term paper'? 

Kitty likes plastic 
Confuses for litter box 
Don't leave tarp around 

Small brave carnivores 
Kill pine cones and mosquitoes 
Fear vacuum cleaner 

Want to trim my claws? 
Don't even think about it! 
My yelps will wake dead. 

I want to be close 
To you. Can I fit my head 
inside your armpit? 

Wanna go outside. 
Oh, shit! Help! I got outside! 
Let me back inside! 

Oh no! Big One 
has been trapped by newspaper! 
Cat to the rescue! 

Humans are so strange. 
Mine lies still in bed, then screams! 
My claws aren't that sharp ... 

Cats meow out of angst 
"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs! 
We could break so much!" 

Litter box not here 
You must have moved it again 
I'll crap in the sink. 

The Big Ones snore now 
Every room is dark and cold 
Time for "Cup Hockey" 

We're almost equals 
I purr to show I love you 
Want to smell my butt? 

Note: I did not write these. They were forwarded to me by a friend, but I do not know who the original creator was. I don't mean to discredit them in any way and I will be happy to give them credit if I can figure out who wrote these.

- Jessica