Images from a Spiritual Painting Practice

in partial fulfillment of requirements for EDFS 304: Religion, Spirituality & Education,
Fall 2003 with Professor J. Robert Nash in conjunction with Cameron Davis, MFA

This class required an independent project involving spirituality, religion and faith. I chose to work with Cami Davis in a spiritual painting practice to explore the roots and beliefs of my own faith. Willing to serve as my spiritual painting advisor, Ms. Davis worked in conjunction with Dr. Nash and myself throughout this process. The images below illustrate where I started (using memories of my own experiences with religion) to where I evolved (with joy and an improved faith in the contributions I could make to others). My final presentation to our class included the last three pieces shown.

Remembrance (early church memory)

Spiritual practice provides the opportunity for a committed, sustained effort. As I continued to explore ways to implement painting in my life, the idea of using it as a medium in which to explore my own experience and ideas of spirituality and religion, and their relation to education, was appealing. I was fortunate to gain the support and guidance for this from Dr. Nash and Ms. Davis.

Initially crude, as my memories were crude, this first rendering expressed visual memories of an early spiritual struggle: the notion of an offering. As a six year old, I was already aware of the importance of money, getting into a tiff with the Sunday School teacher because I didn't want to put my dime in the plastic church. While I lost the argument, the impact of being required to give, when I didn't want to, remained with me for many years.

While spiritual lessons of sharing are important and valuable, timing and an honest readiness for this is, in my mind, critical. I learned to give, not because I wanted to, but because it was required of me. Such well-intended education in a religion often misses the mark of what people hope to instill in their youth. As some define "sin" (missing the mark), they then sin in the manner in which they instruct their young.

During the semester, I moved through this rudimentary beginning to connect with the joy, meaning, and larger presence of "spirit" that, in my mind, may reflect the more essential essence of any religion or unorganized faith. The following pieces illustrate this organic and evolving shift as I emerged from the structured work of how spirituality and religion had been defined to me and explored the inner development of a growing faith.

Showing Up: A Touch of the Divine (self portrait)

Showing Up: A Touch of the Divine Completed in September 2003, this 3 x 4 foot piece was based on what gave me joy - texture, color, gerbera daisies that reminded me of sunbursts, life in green and other flowered things, swirls and pearls. The canvas was handmade, gessoed with white, and then acrylic combined with gels, mediums, and pumice to add depth and tactile differences.

After getting "stuck" for several weeks in which I was unable to produce anything with my painting (though writing instead), my mentor suggested I consider what I loved and what I enjoyed most about painting. She encouraged me to explore these elements as a means of discovering and uncovering my spirit - what gave me inspiration and motiviation, what moved me. This piece was a result of that process: painting from my spirit, from my heart, with joy and curiosity - exploring and discovering the elements I connected with most - color, texture, flowers, and hints of a larger, less defined, etheric entity.

I Saw the Buddha (naming after the doing)

I Saw the Buddha

As I continued to engage in identifying where I was moved to go, I realized I wanted to literally move, to reach when I painted, to use large strokes across an expanse, instead of the small, controlled results as in my calligraphy work. I picked up a 3x5 canvas to see what comes from freedom... from just playing and seeing what shows up... from impetus that is driven from within rather than following an instruction from without.

I Saw the Buddha was named after it was done. Sharing this collection of marks with a visiting friend, "the Buddha" popped out at me. Can you identify the wild "do" that curves in yellow and red from shoulder to sky - right to left - near the top of the piece? The red lips - and "hairstyle" - suggesting a more feminine representation than that of the more masculine renditions - and legend? Do you see the slightly triangular shaped figure whose garbed hands lay hidden within cloth that rests on the crossed legs' knees? The universe that surrounds and weaves in and out amidst the image, suggesting both the humanness, the physicalness of the Buddha while indicative of connection with all through spirit, through boundaries held loosely?

As one who has participated in numerous spiritual practices over the years (New Age Christian, Kouk Sun Do - a mountain Taoist healing practice, Zen Buddhism, Sikhism, and a long time visitor of many multi-faith services), I saw my connection with the Buddha reflecting my sustained admiration for someone who has the capacity to commit and stay on the mark. To sustain a way of life for many years that is both fulfilling and enervating, sustaining and creating. I was surprised to identify this figure in the piece, but also affirmed in knowing the connection with the Buddha and the Zen Buddhist way of life that has contributed to my life.

Chaos' Constancy (the steady within the everchanging)

Chaos' Constancy

Painted in the vertical, this 3x5 foot piece is meaningful in the horizontal, too - an unintended consequence, but delightful feature I uncovered about many of my abstract pieces.
Chaos' Constancy Horizontally

It seems fitting that in expressing diversity in its creation, the piece can be diverse in its presentation. Each element illustrates an opportunity to find value in the new and different, and/or to create bridges where walls have been - shaking up the expected we all have within our limited point of view. Indeed, a "point" of view is only one dot in the physical realm; imagine what a "plane" of view or "3-D" perspective or even "N-Space" view might add in collecting the ways in which the human being might connect with spirit and/or express this through service, worship, community and/or art. Where physical manifestations show variability in color, orientation, action or stillness, shape and size, the spiraled circle at the center holds a focus that can embrace them all - honoring and providing a space and place for each element.

One class member thought this piece was more a self-portrait of me than the earlier one (Showing Up). I suspect they all reflect parts of my spirit, as they only capture a given moment during any one process. If you would like to view Chaos' Constancy and Showing Up in person, they are currently on the walls of a wonderful local restaurant - The Green Room in downtown Burlington.