University of Vermont

Office Of Student And Community Relations

Off Campus Life - FREE Tix, Localvore Doughnuts, & Peace on Prospect
Happy Women's Herstory Month
In This Issue
Ask Ben
Parking Ban
Dog Laws
Dining Deal
FREE Flynn Tickets
Communication is Key
Work for UVM TREK
Comida Para La Gente
PIAA Dialogue
Women in Medicine
Submit a Story
Contact Us

March 2014

March Wildness

We have all learned some interesting new terms this semester, some of which we probably wish we'd never heard of - like polar vortex. But through it all, we've had plenty to keep us going. Now that Spring Break is a distant memory, we wanted to bring you a few items that might help get you through the remaining weeks of the semester. From award-winning plays to conferences and a localvore offer from dining services. There is also the hope that this storm will be the last!

Amanda, Gail, John

PS - It is also tax season and many of you might not realize you may be eligible for a "Renter Rebate" - here is a pdf with information on that.

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Dear Ben:

I live with three other guys downtown. Usually, we are fine but one of my roommates has been getting more and more out of control on weekends - which he starts on Thursdays. This past weekend we all got another $500 ticket. I can't afford this plus the next ticket is a felony. How can I talk to him about this without sounding like his mom?

Mad Broke

Dear Mad Broke,

There are a lot of different things going on here. First of all, you can no longer afford to avoid engaging this roommate in a conversation about his behavior and the impacts it’s having on you. You need to schedule about a half-hour to sit down and try to work this problem out. In fact, your silence could be misconstrued as acceptance of his behavior. Although you didn't say so, it sounds like alcohol and drugs may be involved - check out Living Well or CRC too if that is the case.

First, recognize that it’s your responsibility to help your roommate understand WHY he cannot be rowdy in or around the apartment anymore. This may seem difficult to do this without sounding like a parent or guardian. But roommate needs to hear directly from you about your needs, values and specifically what you expect in the future. If you talk clearly and calmly so he understands where you’re coming from then he’ll likely be willing to control his behavior.

I suggest during your conversation to use "affective statements" such as "When you act this way it gets the whole household in trouble, costs us money, and ruins our weekends. Instead of having fun, we have to talk to spend our time apologizing to the neighbors and talking to the cops when they come to the door".

Then add: “I value having good relationships with our neighbors, they don't deserve being disturbed like this". Also, you must express tangible concerns like possible felony record, eviction by your landlord, and even adversely affecting your relationships with each other.

It’s very important that in your conversation you share with him that you value having him as a roommate but dislike this rowdy behavior. That way you’re clearly differentiating between disliking the behavior and not him personally.

He could get defensive and try to change the subject and call you out for something he dislikes about you. If that happens then calmly say: “if that bothers you, then we can talk about that after we talk about this". Remember to:
  • Discuss one matter at a time.
  • Stay on point and do not allow the conversation to devolve into a tit-for-tat argument.
It’s okay if you need to walk away and come back and try again, sometimes you have to let emotions cool down before you can have a constructive conversation. It may take a couple of attempts to talk with him about the issue before he sees it as something really important to you.

If he does not care about how his behavior has affected you and is not willing to make things right then you need to identify your best alternatives to living with him and then follow through with whatever is in your best interest. This could include asking him to move out or you finding another place to live. Ask yourself what your alternatives are to resolving this situation. By building up good alternatives to a solution before engaging him, you’ll feel more confident and then communicate much more clearly when you decide to have that talk with your roommate.

Remember, you cannot change anyone’s behavior. You control only your own person. All you can do is explain how someone’s behavior is negatively impacting you and then make a request of him or her to change their behavior for you. If you need more help, I am leading a Conflict Resolution Workshop next week, you can sign up here.

Be Well,
Ben Bosley

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Registration for the 9th Annual Dismantling Rape Culture Conference (April 10, 2014) is NOW OPEN!

Registration is FREE for all UVM students, staff and faculty as well as students from any of the Vermont colleges and universities. There is a $20 free for community members.

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Remember, there are 3 ways to find out about parking bans in Burlington, VT:

1. Subscribe to Nixle for info/updates to be sent to your cell phone or e-mail (Nixle group is: Burlington, VT Police Department)

2. Subscribe to the Burlington Parking Ban Yahoo group for info/updates to be sent to your cell phone or e-mail

3. Call (802) 658-SNOW (7669)

NOTE: Residents can park in any city-owned parking garage from 10 pm to 7 am free of charge during a parking ban.

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Looking for something fun to do that doesn't require traveling in this kind of weather?
The UVM Theater production of URINETOWN starts today. Directed by Gregory Ramos it is the "story of a futuristic world, where people must pay for the privilege to urinate. Heroic Bobby Strong leads the fight against this practice in a musical comedy that spoofs musical comedy — and musical drama".

The play runs

3/13 – 3/15 & 3/20 - 3/22 @ 7:30pm
3/15 & 3/23 @ 2:00pm

You can order tickets or try to win a pair of free tickets by filling out this survey - it will take less than a minute.

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Does Your Dog
Need a License?

All dogs in Burlington that are over six months old must be licensed each year on or before April 1st. Below is information on that and here is a pdf with some great guidelines for "Responsible Dog Ownership" in Burlington.

To license your pet, please come to the Burlington Clerk/Treasurer's Office at City Hall or send the rabies & spay/neutering info in the mail to 149 Church Street with a self addressed/stamped envelope. Please note below the hours we are open and the licensing fees (we do not take credit/debit cards). You must bring or send proof that the animal has been currently vaccinated against rabies with a vaccine comparable to that required in the State of Vermont. If the dog was licensed last year we may have a valid rabies certificate on file, so you can just mail in the fee payable to the City of Burlington.

To receive a reduced licensing fee, you must provide a certificate of sterilization from a licensed veterinarian or it must be indicated on the rabies certificate under sex (i.e. MN=male neutered or FS=female spayed). Anyone missing the April 1st deadline is charged a late fee (see fee schedule below).

Please call the Clerk/Treasurer’s Office (865-7000) if your dog is no longer with you so that we may update our files.

Clerk/Treasurer’s Office Hours:
Monday – Fridays 8:00 a.m. – 4:30 p.m.

Fees on or before April 1st:
Neutered/Spayed - $26.00
Un-Neutered or Un-Spayed - $46.00

Fees after April 1st:
Neutered/Spayed - $28.00
Un-Neutered or Un-Spayed - $48.00

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Foodhub & Sodexo!


Get thw best of both worlds with local food and points.

Want to support Vermont farmers and enjoy the convenience of eating on campus? You can have both!

The Intervale Food Hub has partnered with University Dining Services at UVM to offer local food subscriptions combined with points. You can now cook at home with local foods and still enjoy a meal, drink or snack on-campus between classes – all while saving money!

Sign up for an Intervale Food Hub customizable local food subscription and receive fresh delicious Vermont food delivered weekly to the Davis Center. Plus, get up to a 20% bonus when you add points that can be used at any campus dining location. Living off-campus just got a whole lot better!

Click here to sign up!

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Win 2 Flynn Tickets
to Lucky Plush

Lucky Plush is a Chicago dance theater group that creates rich, complex work that anyone can enjoy. In Cinderbox 2.0, the award-winning group explores reality television and the anxiety of hyper-networked America, in turn creating an experience that’s hilarious, thought-provoking, and unpredictable. With offbeat comedy and cracked storytelling, Lucky Plush skewers modern media’s voyeuristic approach to “reality” and blurs the line between audience and performer.

We are offering 3 pairs of tickets to three randomly selected people who complete this 8 question survey - it literally takes seconds to enter.

Communication is Key!

By Jesse Mosello and XuXu Zhang
Part of the GeoStories Project

Emily Lee is a UVM alumna who graduated in 2003 and has continued to reside in the city of Burlington for 15 years. She has lived on Bradley Street for the past four years with her family, which includes her husband and his 22-year-old son, and their 16-year-old daughter. We asked her to share her thoughts on what the biggest issues are between permanent residents and UVM students who live off-campus.

Permanent vs. Transient Resident

“The most challenging thing I have found from being a permanent resident on Bradley Street is the transient nature of students,” Lee notes. “They only live off campus for a couple of years and usually live in a different apartment or house each year.” College students can make it very difficult to create a sense of community, she adds, because there’s a constant movement of people.

Lee’s kids have also found it quite difficult to live on Bradley Street. They often complain about the noise and have been kept up late or have been awakened in the middle of the night on school nights.

The family also has to deal regularly with all the noise that comes from partying during the weekends.

Communicating With Neighbors Is Key

Lee believes being proactive and neighborly right from the start can go a long way, especially to prevent problems later on. “I have no problem calling the police if it gets too noisy, I call all the time, but I usually try to get to know my neighbors beforehand so I can call or text them to be quiet,” she notes. “I have found it very beneficial to introduce myself to my neighbors ahead of time, so I can let them know what’s acceptable and what isn’t acceptable, and that I will call the police if necessary.”

For example, Lee recently made an effort to meet with new neighbors as soon as they moved in. It has helped prevent problem, she thinks, and has also “helped them develop a stronger short-term sense of community.” Since then, she has reached out to them a few times to ask them to clean up and better organize their garbage, and they are usually responsive when she asks them to be quieter.

The Benefits of Student Neighbors

Even though it can be quite difficult for families to live in a city that’s made up of majority college students, Emily has found there to be some positives as well. She discussed “that she loves the vibrancy that college students bring,” she notes. “It’s always fun to sit on my porch and watch students go by.” She feels that college students add a lot to the Burlington community, “I just wish there was more continuity and more respect for permanent residents at times.”

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A reminder that the info session for prospective Wilderness & Community Service TREK leaders will be held in the Billings Marsh Lounge (3rd floor) at 7pm. Come learn more about TREK 2014 and the ways you can be
become involved in welcoming UVM's newest community members in August!
Applications are due on Monday 3/31by midnight and notification for acceptance on Friday 4/10. leaner more by visiting the TREK website:

The Dana Medical Library is currently displaying “American Women in Medicine and Health Care Sciences” in celebration of UVM Women’s HERStory Month. The exhibit highlights some of the extraordinary achievements and famous firsts by women, and is on view throughout the month of March. The exhibit was designed by Nelson Sears of the Dana Medical Library and will also be on display at the College of Medicine Hoehl gallery in the Given Medical building.

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Interested in sharing your
voice in the newsletter?

Submit anything from a suggestion for a story to a finished piece - we want to hear from you!
Submit My Story
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Contact Us

Whether you have a specific issue, want to make some tea before class, or are just curious about what we're up to - please stop by Pearl House and let us help make your off-campus experience successful, positive, and empowering.

We are located at 12 Colchester Avenue - next to John Dewey Hall and in front of the Outing Club.

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Office of Student & Community Relations
12 Colchester Avenue
Burlington, VT 05405

Last modified November 13 2014 01:27 PM