Round One:
In an attempt to fully analyze the infamous serial killer Hannibal Lecter, the world famous psychiatrist Sigmund Freud is called in to perform that analysis personally.

"So tell me about your father, Dr. Lecter."

"I bit his nose off and ate it with a side dish of olives when I was a child."

"I see...obviously an attempt to displace him and gain the affection of your mother."

"No, actually I felt rather indifferent about my mother. I just didn't particularly care for my father. He had made an attempt to make me wear a sailor suit earlier that day, and I desired a very basic form of revenge."

"Ah...so you are a homosexual."

"No, I just didn't care much for my father."

"I see..."

Please...come here Dr. Freud."

Believing that he is making slow but steady progress, Freud comes within arm's reach of Hannibal. Moving with remarkable speed, Dr. Lecter lashes out, grabbing Freud by the testicles and twisting until Freud's face goes purple with pain.

"Now Dr. Freud...tell me about your parents..."

Round One goes to Hannibal Lecter.

Round Two:
Hannibal Lecter, making the smooth transition from incarcerated serial killer to brilliant psychiatrist, spend the next several hours analyzing Sigmund Freud.

"So Dr. Freud, I understand that you have quite the nasty cocaine addiction."

"Yes."

"And where do you think that addiction came from? Before you answer, please remember to leave your parents and phallices out of your response. You know what happens when you do not cooperate." Lecter dips one of Freud's four missing fingers into a dish of sour cream and takes a bite.

"Well, I'm actually not sure, but I had a dream about it once."

"Ah yes, the dream analysises...how could we forget those?"

"Well, it all related back to the fact that the tube which I used to snort the cocaine resembled my father's penis..."

Lecter breathes a sigh, disturbed by Freud's apparent lack of a learning curve and obsession with sex organs, reaches for a sharp knife to commence with punishment...

Round Two goes to Hannibal Lecter, as something indescribably gruesome happens off camera.