Let's face it, people love death and pain. Sure, we've got anti-war movements, people yelling to stop the hate, but human nature never changes. This section is designed to make light of our gruesome inner beasts, feeding the id with a weekly down and dirty fight between a pair of well-known characters. Most of the time these characters will be fictional, although I have no objection to writing the ideal deaths of certain real-life figures, especially politicians.
The Next Fight:
Previous Fights:
Jennifer Connelly versus Liv Tyler
Drizzt Do'urden versus Hellboy
Red Sonya versus She-Ra
Wonder Woman versus Samus Aran
He-Man versus Conan the Barbarian
Al Gore versus John Kerry
Mr. Rogers versus Jason Voorhees
Princess Daisy versus Princess Peach
Superman versus Lex Luthor
Teddy Roosevelt versus the Punisher
The Dread Pirate Roberts versus Captain Morgan
Michael Moore versus Bill O'Reilly
Chuck Norris Takes On All Comers
The Knights of the Dinner Table versus the Order of the Stick
Agent 47 versus John McClane
Mel Brooks versus Mel Gibson
Chuck Norris versus Jack Bauer
Zombie Godzilla versus Zombie Superman
Bugs Bunny versus the Trix Rabbit
Agent Smith versus Elrond Half-Elven
Derek Stiles versus Phoenix Wright
Christopher Lee versus Voldemort
Maximus versus Robocop
Mr. T versus the Ultimate Warrior
The Phantom of the Opera versus V
Pikachu versus the Punisher
Sherlock Holmes versus Auguste Dupin
Chuck Norris versus Terrorism
George "Dubya" Bush versus John Kerry
The Tin Woodman versus the T-1000
Big O versus Optimus Prime
Abraham Lincoln versus George Washington
Sam Spade versus Max Payne
V versus Batman
The Cheat versus Krypto the Super Dog
Franklin Roosevelt versus Christopher Walken
The Flash versus Carrie Cole
The Jedi Council versus the Green Lantern Corps
Solid Snake versus Agent 47
Bert versus Adolf Hitler
Superman versus George W. Bush
Indiana Jones versus Lara Croft
Spike Spiegel versus Vash the Stampede
Ryoko versus the Incredible Hulk
George Bush versus George "Dubya" Bush
Gollum versus Jar Jar Binks
Tommy Versetti versus Max Payne
Spawn versus Steve Buscemi
Munchkins versus Oompaloompas
Julia Roberts versus Halle Berry
The Pen versus the Sword
The Z Fighters versus the X-Men
Hannibal Lecter versus the Incredible Hulk
Superman versus Bruce Campbell
Mario versus a Slinky
George W. Bush versus a Pretzel
Mr. T versus Carrot Top
Triangle Man versus Superman
Max Headroom versus Britney Spears
Iron Man versus Iron Man
Hannibal Lecter versus Sigmund Freud
Shaft versus Mace Windu
Vegeta versus Wolverine
Vegeta versus Sean Connery
Max Payne versus Solid Snake 2
Hitler versus Doctor Evil
Hitler versus Gandhi
Ozzy Osbourne versus Marilyn Manson
Max Payne versus Solid Snake
Furious George Takes on All Comers
Michael Jackson versus Janet Jackson
Iron Man versus Mr. Roboto
Shaft Takes on All Comers
Daredevil versus Christopher Walken
Doctor Evil versus James Bond
Doctor Evil versus Commando Cody
Spawn versus Shirley Temple
The Incredible Hulk versus Godzilla
Frieza versus the Emperor
Charlton Heston versus King Kong
Power Rangers versus Gundam Wing
George Bush versus Al Gore
Animal versus the Tazmanian Devil
Darph Bobo versus Darth Maul
Sephiroth versus Darth Vader
The Powerpuff Girls versus Charlie's Angels
Goku versus Superman
Godzilla versus the Big Lizard
Zechs Marquis versus Batman
Tenchi Masaki versus Luke Skywalker
The Knights of the Dinner Table versus the Fantastic Four
The Incredible Hulk versus Darth Vader
Morgan Blackhand versus Agent Smith
Bert versus Ernie
Pikachu versus Mighty Mouse
Elminster versus Gandalf
The Tick versus Superman
Dr. Doom versus Dr. Evil