Since I've spent so long in academia, I've learned that many intellectual types like to stroke their own egos with mounds of bullshit, pretending there's some sort of hidden meaning in something that only they can see. There are also the types who have some sort of quasi-erotic attraction to being outraged and offended, and who dig deep for hidden meanings that can be read as racism, oppression, or the like. This section is intended as a parody of those types. If it seems I'm serious about my rants here, then it just means I'm really good about being sarcastic. Honestly.